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For sixty years, starving and/or drunken patrons have frequented IHOP's across this great nation. Their claim to be the International House of Pancakes has been indeed their claim to fame, at least here in the US of A (ironically). But now, the end of an era is upon us. For whatever reason (not sales, as those are up around 50 percent), IHOP is getting its name flipped upside down, turning the pleasant to say IHOP to the strange to say IHOb.
But what does this "b" stand for? Someone claiming to be an executive with the company has released on Reddit that the "b" will stand for burgers, the classic American pastime meal. Others, perhaps unable or unwilling to let go of the past, are hoping the "b" stands for breakfast, or maybe even bacon. I mean, who wouldn't love an International House of Bacon? I might get married there! As long as they didn't sell IHOP bacon anyway, that stuff is thin and pathetic.
While burgers, breakfast, and bacon are all valid possibilities, one would have to wonder, what is the point? IHOP is doing well right now, something the storied breakfast chain hasn't always done in their sixty-year existence. Despite the name change being a hot topic, many experts are warning that this might be one of the worst timed rebrandings in the history of corporate America. If bacon or breakfast is the answer to the mystery, then who cares? But if the "b" is to be short for burgers, what makes IHOP think they can suddenly compete with nearly every other chain in America, as burgers are as common in this nation as obesity. They will become just another Denny's; a subpar diner taking good dollars away from the privately owned diner in your town that is infinitely better. The only thing that made IHOP unique, it being a glorious tribute to the pancake, would be washed away, and left with some burgers that I'm sure we could get at Red Robin.
However, according to one man, a Brian Zelden from a supposedly George Soros funded video podcast entitled Would U Rather!?!, the "b" in IHOb stands for Brian's urine, as he used to regularly urinate in the buttermilk pancake batter at his local IHOP. He claims to have done this for over a year, and, even more horrifically, says that customers complained that the pancakes didn't taste the same after he quit his job. Whether this is true or not remains to be seen, but the man, and his co-host Andy Ross, did release this video and then, less than a month later, IHOP is changing its name. Coincidence? You decide.
Regardless of the cause for this move, I personally don't care, as IHOP is dead to me for as long as pigs in a blanket are not on the menu. I mean, seriously, that is a breakfast classic, pancakes rolled up with delicious sausages in the middle, who doesn't want to eat that? IHOP, IHOb, I could care less; I just want my International House of Pigs in a Blanket. My IHOPb.
If you care to let me know your opinion, feel free to add me on social media @bongstudly. Although I don't go on all that often because social media is cancer.